瘦人瘦相-That-lean-and-Hungry-look中英文对照

瘦人瘦相ThatleanandHungrylook中英文对照（今天在一本书发现的幽默美文，觉得很好，回来搜了贴出来）来源：高菲的日志作者：SusanBrittJord凯撒说得好。瘦子值得注意。我成年之后化了大半时光观察瘦子。对他们却没有产生丝毫喜爱之情。只要一群身形狭窄的人们向我走来，我全身都会颤栗。瘦子的性格千奇百怪，但他们的共同点是不讨人喜欢，爱挖苦人。他们有的是“全能超人”，不懂装懂，有的机械呆板，有的盛气凌人，有的喋喋不休，有的风风火火，急于求成。瘦子总让人感到危险。Caesarwasright.Thinpeopleneedwatching.I'vebeenwatchingthemformostofmyadultlife,andIdon'tlikewhatIsee.Whenthesenarrowfellowsspringatme,Iquivertomytoes.Thinpeoplecomeinallpersonalities,mostofthemmenacing.You'vegotyourtogetherthinperson,yourmechanicalthinperson,yourcondescendingthinperson,yourtsk-tskthinperson,yourefficiency-expertthinperson.Allofthemaredangerous.首先，瘦子沉闷乏味，缺乏幽默感。他们不懂得如何消闲，（甚至根本不知道消闲是什么）他们总是忙里忙外的。要是给他们一点时间喝咖啡小憩片刻，他们恐怕会绕着办公室慢跑两圈。要是让他们在家里安安静静的呆上一晚，他们会钉钉纱门，或用舌头舔贴绿贴画。他们爱说“白天太短了”之类的话。而胖子从不会有此类言辞，因为他们觉得白天实在长得不能再长了。Inthefirstplace,thinpeoplearen'tfun.Theydon'tknowhowtogoofoff,atleastinthebest,fatsenseoftheword.They'vealwaysgottobeadoing.Givethemacoffeebreak,andthey'lljogaroundtheblock.Supplythemwithaquieteveningathome,andthey'llfixthescreendoorandlickS&Hgreenstamps.Theysaythingsliketherearen'tenoughhoursintheday.Fatpeopleneversaythat.Fatpeoplethinkthedayistoodamnlongalready.Thinpeoplemakemetired.They'vegotspeedylittlemetabolismsthatcausethemtobustlebriskly.They'reforeverrubbingtheirbonyhandstogetherandeyeingnewproblemstotackle.Iliketosurroundmyselfwithsluggish,inert,easygoingfatpeople,thekindwhobelievethatifyoucleanituptoday,it'lljustgetdirtyagaintomorrow.有人觉得我们活泼开朗的胖子不可理喻。像我们长着胖胖的脸蛋的人就应该神经兮兮，病怏怏，多愁善感。我不同意这种说法。胖子未必一整天都是乐呵呵的，尽管这样他们也比那些干瘪的瘦子活得开心得多。瘦子年纪轻轻就养成了一副坏脾气，变得苛刻，顽固。这是因为他们不知道吃个乳汁软糖冰激凌对缓解压力有多大的帮助。瘦子不爱甜软的食物，因为他们自己长得又干又硬，更别说甜美可爱了。他们既脆弱又无味，就像萝卜。他们一针见血，而胖子则喜欢糊里糊涂，顺其自然，按部就班。瘦子总是在挖掘真理，而胖子明白世上根本就不存在真理。我的一个瘦子朋友总是在解决那些错综复杂的棘手的难题，还说道，“关键在于。。。。。。”胖子从不那么说，因为任何事情都没有什么关键所在。Somepeoplesaythebusinessaboutthejollyfatpersonisamyth,thatallofuschubbiesareneurotic,sick,sadpeople.Idisagree.Fatpeoplemaynotbechortlingalldaylong,butthey'reahellofalotnicerthanthewizenedandshriveled.Thinpeopleturnsurly,meanandhardatayoungagebecausetheyneverlearnthevalueofahot-fudgesundaeforeasingtension.Thinpeopledon'tlikegooeysoftthingsbecausetheythemselvesareneithergooeynorsoft.Theyarecrunchyanddull,likecarrots.Theygostraighttotheheartofthematterwhilefatpeopleletthingsstayallblurryandhazyandvague,thewaythingsactuallyare.Thinpeoplewanttofacethetruth.Fatpeopleknowthatthereisnotruth.Oneofmythinfriendsisalwaysstaringatcomplex,unsolvableproblemsandsaying,Thekeythingis...Fatpeopleneversaythingslikethat.Theyknowthereisn'tanysuchthingasthekeythingaboutanything.瘦子相信逻辑：胖子看问题面面俱到。胖子看到的往往是模糊朦胧的一团乱麻，根本就没什么值得担心的。瘦子却在坚持：“如果你吸收的热量超过你消耗的热量”，我的一个瘦子朋友说道，“你就会变得更胖。”听了这些话，胖子总会咧嘴一笑，其实对此他们比谁都明白。Thinpeoplebelieveinlogic.Fatpeopleseeallsides.Thesidesfatpeopleseeareroundedblobs,usuallygray,alwaysnebulousandtrulynotworthworryingabout.Butthethinpersonpersists,Ifyouconsumemorecaloriesthanyouburn,saysoneofmythinfriends,youwillgainweight.It'sthatsimple.Fatpeoplealwaysgrinwhentheyhearstatementslikethat.Theyknowbetter.Fatpeoplerealizethatlifeisillogicalandunfair.TheyknowverywellthatGodisnotinhisheavenandallisnotrightwiththeworld.IfGodwasupthere,fatpeoplecouldhavetwodoughnutsandabigorangedrinkanytimetheywantedit.瘦子总在对我滔滔不绝地讲一连串有逻辑的事情。他们每讲完一件，就伸一个指头记着，我就没法走神了。他们慢吞吞地讲话，好像把我当孩子一样。他们讲得那么多，而且漏洞百出。其中经常出现这些词句，比如“把握自己”，“吸烟有害健康”，：“胆固醇阻塞”，“体壮如牛”，“计划组织”，“合理管理财政”。Thinpeoplehavealonglistoflogicalthingstheyarealwaysspoutingofftome.Theyholduponefingeratatimeastheyreeloffthesethings,soIwon'tlosetrack.Theyspeakslowlyasiftoayoungchild.Thelistislongandfullofholes.Itcontainstidbitslikegetagriponyourself,cigaretteskill,cholesterolclogs,fitasafiddle,ducksinarow,organize,andsoundfiscalmanagement.Phraseslikethat.他们认为这份包括2000个要点的计划意味着幸福快乐。胖子却懂得幸福是难以捉摸的；就算他们具备了瘦子列出的所有条件，他们有不会稀罕。他们太明智了，看得清这种计划太无聊，太艰苦，太不实际。还不如一个奶酪蛋糕来的现实些。Theythinkthese2000-pointplansleadtohappiness.Fatpeopleknowhappinessiselusiveatbestandeveniftheycouldgetthekindthinpeopletalkabout,theywouldn'twantit.Wisely,fatpeopleseethatsuchprogramsaretoodull,toohard,toooffthemark.Theyareneverbetterthanawholecheesecake.胖子理解生活的痛苦。他们珍惜夜晚的时光，好运气和自己的命运，不管明天怎样只管享受眼前。我认识一个瘦子，他建议我们在玩拼图的时候，按照形状，大小和颜色来讲，这样可以节省一半的时间。我可不愿那么干。第一，我喜欢糊里糊涂的做事情，第二，早早结束游戏有什么好处？第三，拼图本身并不重要，要紧的是享受四个人（包括那个瘦子）围着一张牌桌玩拼图的乐趣。那个朋友实在没有办法，只好出去给杨树填土解闷。三个胖子继续玩，还做了褐色的双层又甜又软的蛋糕祝拼图成功。Fatpeopleknowallaboutthemysteryoflife.Theyaretheonesacquaintedwiththenight,withluck,withfate,withplayingitbytheear.OnethinpersonIknowoncesuggestedthatwearrangeallthepartsofajigsawpuzzleintogroupsaccordingtosize,shapeandcolor.Hefiguredthiswouldcutthetimeneededtocompletethepuzzlebyatleast50percent.IsaidIwouldn'tdoit.One,Iliketomuddlethrough.Two,whatgoodwoulditdotofinishearly?Three,thejigsawpuzzleisn'ttheimportantthing.Theimportantthingisthefunoffourpeople(onethinpersonincluded)sittingaroundacardtable,workingajigsawpuzzle.Mythinfriendhadnouseformylist.Insteadofjoiningus,hewentoutsideandmulchedtheboxwoods.Thethreeremainingfatpeoplefinishedthepuzzleandmadechocolatedouble-fudgedbrowniestocelebrate.瘦子最大的问题在于他们使人感到压抑。他们的野心勃勃，骨瘦嶙峋的身体，高速的节拍，干净利落的屋角，大脑的机械运作方式和当机立断像乌云一样笼罩着胖子那松弛，舒适，广阔，温馨的世界。胖子早已脱