Unit-4-Love-and-loving-relationship

LoveandLovingRelationshipsNijoleV.BenokraitisUnit4Whataretheessentialfactorsinchoosingyourboyfriend/girlfriend?Appearance:Character:Job:Familybackground:ResponsibleReliableHard-workingHumorousEasy-going…GenerousRomanticSmartConsiderateknowledgeable…Whatcharactersmakeyourdreamman?Astoryaboutlove:Oncealadywhenhavingaconversationwithherlover,asked:Lady:Whydoyoulikeme..?Whydoyouloveme?Man:Ican'ttellthereason..butIreallylikeyou..Lady:Youcan'teventellmethereason...howcanyousayyoulikeme?Howcanyousayyouloveme?Man:Ireallydon'tknowthereason,butIcanprovethatIloveU.Lady:Proof?No!Iwantyoutotellmethereason.Myfriend'sboyfriendcantellherwhyhelovesherbutnotyou!Man:Ok.ok!!!Emmmmm..becauseyouarebeautiful,becauseyourvoiceissweet,becauseyouarecaring,becauseyouareloving,becauseyouarethoughtful,becauseofyoursmile,becauseofyoureverymovements.Theladyfeltverysatisfiedwiththeman'sanswer.....Unfortunately,afewdayslater,theladymetwithanaccidentandwentincomma.Theguythenplacedaletterbyherside,andhereisthecontent:Darling,BecauseofyoursweetvoicethatIloveyou...Nowcanyoutalk?No!ThereforeIcannotloveyou.BecauseofyourcareandconcernthatIlikeyou.Nowthatyoucannotshowthem,thereforeIcannotloveyou.Becauseofyoursmile,becauseofyoureverymovementsthatIloveyou.Nowcanyousmile?Nowcanyoumove?No,thereforeIcannotloveyou...Ifloveneedsareason,likenow,Thereisnoreasonformetoloveyouanymore.Doesloveneedareason?NO!Therefore,Istillloveyou...Sometimesthebestandthemostbeautifulthingsintheworldcannotbeseen,cannotbetouched,butcanbefeltintheheartWhatislove?Loveisasensation(感觉）(basedonphysicalandemotionalattraction)thatmagically,spontaneouslygenerateswhenMr.orMrsRightappears.Loveisastrongfeelingofattachment(爱慕、喜爱）,intimacyandlongingbetweenpeople.Suchafeelingmakespeopleunselfishandwillingtodevoteallthattheyhave.Loveistheattachmentthatresultsfromdeeplyappreciatinganother’sgoodness.Whatislove?Commonandessentiallove:•familylove•friends,•thelovebetweenamanandawoman.UnderstandingloveandmarriageMutualunderstandingiscrucialtothesuccessofmarriage.Asasayinggoes:Marriageisthegraveforlove.”Toacertainextent,ithassomepointinit,becauseloveinmostcaseisromanticandtheloveronlyseesthebrightsideofhisorhercounterpart,butthemarriageinvolvesmoreunpleasantthings.Duringthedailylife,younotonlydiscoverhisorherbrightside,youmayalsobereluctanttofindsometimeshimorheroffensivetoyou.Therefore,mutualunderstandingisprettyimportanttomaintainagoodmarriage.Withoutit,thecoupleswillonlycomplaineachotherwhenconfrontedwithconflictsbetweenthem.Astimegoesbyandthetensionexists,moreoftenthannot,themarriagewilleventuallyfallcollapsed.Sothemostandforemostthingthatacoupleshouldkeepinmindisthatthepreciouslovethatbindthemtogether.Ifnotforthat,howcouldtheygettoknowandfallinlovewitheachother?TipstoLoveandHappyMarriage1.Starteachdaywithakissorahug2.Wearyourweddingringatalltimes3.Acceptdifferences4.Begentle5.Selectasongthatcanbe“oursong”6.DowhattheotherpersonwantsbeforeheorsheasksTipstoLoveandHappyMarriage7.Encourage8.Knowhisorherneeds9.Complimenttwiceaday10.Callduringtheday11.Askforeachothers’opinion12.Showrespect13.CelebratebirthdaysinabigwayTipstoLoveandHappyMarriage14.Apologize15.Forgive16.Bepositive17.Respondquicklytotheotherperson’srequest18.Treateachothers’friendsandrelativeswithcourtesyIdiomsaboutlove:lovebirds鸳鸯fallinlove相爱loveatfirstsight一见钟情beheadoverheelsinlove热恋中haveacrushonsb迷恋sweepsb.offtheirfeet另某人一见倾心Forbetter,forworse;Forricher,forpoorer;Insicknessandinhealth;Toloveandtocherish;Tilldeathusdopart.MarriageVowsBackgroundofthetextThetextisextractedfromMarriagesandFamiliesbyNijoleV.Benokraitis.Thebookhasbeenusedasatextbookforsociologycoursesandwomen’sstudiesinanumberofuniversitiesintheU.S.Ithighlightsimportantcontemporarychangesinsocietyandthefamilyandexploresthechoicesthatareavailabletofamilymembers,aswellastheconstraintsthatmanyofusdonotrecognize.ItexaminesthediversityofAmericanfamiliestoday,usingcross-culturalandmulticulturalcomparisonstoencouragecreativethinkingaboutthemanycriticalissuedthatconfrontthefamilyofthetwenty-firstcentury.TextAnalysis---LoveandLovingRelationshipsPart1.[Paras.1-3]Mainidea:Loveisessentialforhumansurvival.Arguments:[Para.1]A.Thefamilyisusuallyourearliestandmostimportantsourceofloveandemotionalsupport.B.Babiesandchildrendeprivedoflovehavebeenknowntodevelopawidevarietyofproblems.Supports:TextAnalysis---LoveandLovingRelationshipsProblemsbabiesandchildrendevelop(whichsometimes:DepressionHeadachesPhysiologicalimpairments生理方面的残疾Neuroticandpsychosomaticdifficulties神经质及心理上的压力造成的疾病IncontrastInfantswhoarelovedandcuddledtypicallygainmoreweight,cryless,andsmilemore.Byfiveyearsofage,theyhavebeenfoundtohavesignificantlyhigherIQsandtoscorehigheronlanguagetests.TextAnalysis---LoveandLovingRelationshipsMainidea:Loveisessentialforhumansurvival.Arguments:[Paras.2-3]C.Muchresearchshowsthatthequalityofcareinfantsreceiveaffectstheirlifeinmanyways.Supports:(how…,how…,how…,how….)(Sopeople’searlyintimaterelationshipswithintheirfamilyoforiginarecritical.)Incontrast,…D.Loveforoneself,orself-love,isa