作文句子润色

句子润色，提高写作分数一、用从句：（定语从句，名词性从句（主，表，宾，同），状语从句）1.Igotonabus.Therewerealreadytoomanypeopleonit.(定语从句)Igotonabuswheretherewerealreadytoomanypeopleonit.2.Hegotthefirstplaceintheexam.Itsurprisedusalot.(非限制性定语从句)Hegotthefirstplaceintheexam，whichsurprisedusalot3.Louisewasbornin1931.Heisafamousartistnow.(定语从句)Louisewasbornin1931whoisafamousartistnow.4.Herparentswouldn’tlethimmarrythegirl.Herfamilywaspoor.(定语从句)Herparentswouldn’tlethimmarrythegirlwhosefamilywaspoor.5.Itsurprisedmegreatly.Ifoundshewassuchafineswimmer.(用what引导的主语从句)Whatsurprisedmegreatlywastofindshewassuchafineswimmer.6.HeofferedmeapieceofadvicethatIshouldcheerupandstartalloveragain.(what引导的主语从句)WhatheofferedmewasthatIshouldcheerupandstartalloveragain.7.Theadvantagesareasfollows.Itisveryconvenientforustocommunicatewitheachother.Itisverycheapforustobuyit.(用表语从句合成一句)Theadvantagesarethatitisveryconvenientforustocommunicatewitheachotherandverycheapforustobuyit.8.Thenewsisthatwewonthegame.Itmadeuswildwithjoy.(用同位语从句)Thenewsthatwewonthegamemadeuswildwithjoy.9.Heworkedveryhard.Hemadegreatprogressinhisstudy.(状语从句)Heworkedveryhardsothatmadegreatprogressinhisstudy.10.Heonlyenteredthecontestforfun,buthewonthefirstprize.(状语从句)Althoughheonlyenteredthecontestforfun,hewonthefirstprize.二．用非谓语（todo,doing,done，with复合结构）1.WhenIheardthat,Iwasmuchmoved.Hearingthat,Iwasmuchmoved.2.Theywerefacedwithmanyproblems.Theydidn’tloseheart.Facedwithmanyproblems,theydidn’tloseheart.3.Inthispicture,amotherbirdstaysinhernestinabigtree.Themotherbirdwatchesherbabiesflyingaway.Inthispicture,amotherbirdstaysinhernestinabigtree,watchingherbabiesflyingaway.4.Hewantstobeadmittedbytheidealuniversity.Hestudieshard.Inordertobeadmittedbytheidealuniversityhestudieshard.5.Thegirlisstaringatthepicture.Thegirlismyformerclassmate.Thegirlstaringatthepictureismyformerclassmate.6.Hefellasleep.Thelightswerestillon.(with复合结构)Hefellasleep,withthelightson.7.Societyisdevelopingrapidly.ItisquitenecessarythatweshouldhaveagoodknowledgeofEnglishandcomputer.(with复合结构)Withsocietydevelopingrapidly,itisquitenecessarythatweshouldhaveagoodknowledgeofEnglishandcomputer.8.2,2200peoplewerekilledintheearthquake,andthousandsmorewereinjured.22,200peoplewerekilledintheearthquake,withthousandsmoreinjured.9.Alltheafternoonheworked.Thedoorwaslocked.Alltheafternoonheworkedwiththedoorlocked.10.Thegameiscomingsoon.Wearebusypracticing.Withthegamecomingsoonwearebusypracticing.11.Ihadmuchworktodo.Icouldn’tgoouttoplayfootballwithhim.Withmuchworktodo,Icouldn’tgoouttoplayfootballwithhim.三用倒装1.Wecanliveahappylifeonlybythismeans.Onlybythismeanscanweliveahappylife.2.ThemomentIenteredtheroom,myphonerang.NosoonerhadIenteredtheroomthanmyphonerang.3.Whenwestudyhard,werealizeourdream.Onlywhenwestudyhardcanwerealizeourdreams.4.Heisachild,butheknowsalot.Childasheis,heknowsalot.5.Heseldomstaysupuntilmidnight.Seldomdoeshestayupuntilmidnight.6.Henotonlyhadhelpedlotsofpeople,healsokeptitasecret.Notonlyhadhehelpedlotsofpeoplebutalsokeptitasecret.7.Ididn’tpickupmycourageuntilthen.NotuntilthendidIpickupmycourage.8.Hehasatnotimebeenbraverthaninthatcase.Atnotimehashebeenbraverthaninthatcase.9.Sheissuchakindgirlthatwealllikeher.Suchakindgirlisshethatwealllikeher.10.WecanmakeprogressinEnglishonlyinthisway.Onlyinthiswaycanwemakeprogress.四用强调（Itis/was、、、that或do/does/did+动词原形）1.IrealizetheimportanceofEnglishwhenIenteredseniorhighschool.Itwasn’tuntilIenteredseniorhighschoolthatIrealizedtheimportanceof…..2.50%ofthestudentssurveyedchoosesuperstarastheiridols.(强调数字)Itis50%ofthestudentssurveyedthat/whochoosesuperstarastheiridols.3.Herbraveryandcalmnesssavedher.Itwasherbraveryandcalmnessthatsavedher.4.Ibelievehealthisbetterthanwealth.Idobelievehealthisbetterthanwealth.5.Hedidn’tfinishhisworkbecausehewascareless.(强调原因)Itwasbecausehewascarelessthathedidn’tfinishhiswork.五．用被动1Theycarriedoutasurveyamong260students.Asurveywascarriedoutamong260students.2.Weshouldpaymoreattentiontoprotectingtheenvironment.Moreattentionshouldbepaidtoprotectingtheenvironment.3.Thegovernmentshouldtakeeffectivemeasurestoimproveit.Effectivemeasuresshouldbetakentoimproveitbythegovernment.英语作文如何修改“MyWaytoLearnEnglish”•Asweallknow,Englishlearningismoreandmoreimportant.It'sabigproblemtoimproveourEnglish.IusedtobepooratEnglish.Butaftertryingmanyusefulways,Imakesomeprogress.•Iwaspooratreciting.Toslovethisproblem,Iwritedownthewordslist.IreaditwhenIamwaitingforthebusorwaitinginline.•Afterusingthiswayandworkinghard,myEnglishhasimprovedalot.WhatausefulwaytolearnEnglish.简析•写英语学习方法也是十分热门的考题。•这篇文章中规中矩，思路较为清晰，语法也没有错误。但在考场上也拿不了高分，以上海2012中考评分为例，本文最多是7+8+2=17分。•这篇文章要修改，主要可从以下几个问题上入手：1.语言平平无奇、繁琐；2.句式单一；3.缺少复合句；4.缺少中心句；•接下来我们一个点一个点地来修改。1•Asweallknow,Englishlearningismoreandmoreimportant.It'sabigproblemtoimproveourEnglish.AsfarasI'mconcerned,It'ssuchanurgentproblemtolearnEnglishwellbecauseofthewideruseofEnglish.1.润色语言（改换已经用烂了的短语）；2.添加复合句（becauseof）2•IusedtobepooratEnglish.Butaftertryingmanyusefulways,Imakesomeprogress.Iwaspooratreciting.•语言重复繁琐且单调。•改：IusedtobepooratrecitingEnglishwords.•注：使用了方法并取得进步可以放在后文进行具体的交代。3•Tos