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Book3Unit1PersonalityTheMiseryofShynessShynessisthecauseofmuchunhappinessforagreatmanypeople.Allkindsofpeopledescribethemselvesasshy:short,tall,dull,intelligent,young,old,slim,overweight.Shypeopleareanxiousandself-conscious;thatis,theyareexcessivelyconcernedwiththeirownappearanceandactions.Worrisomethoughtsareconstantlyswirlingintheirminds:WhatkindofimpressionamImaking?Dotheylikeme?DoIsoundstupid?I'mugly.I'mwearingunattractiveclothes.Itisobviousthatsuchuncomfortablefeelingsmustaffectpeopleadversely.Aperson'sself-conceptisreflectedinthewayheorshebehaves,andthewayapersonbehavesaffectsotherpeople'sreactions.Ingeneral,thewaypeoplethinkaboutthemselveshasaprofoundeffectonallareasoftheirlives.Forinstance,peoplewhohaveapositivesenseofself-worthorhighself-esteemusuallyactwithconfidence.Becausetheyhaveself-assurance,theydonotneedconstantpraiseandencouragementfromotherstofeelgoodaboutthemselves.Self-confidentpeopleparticipateinlifeenthusiasticallyandspontaneously.Theyarenotaffectedbywhatothersthinktheyshoulddo.Peoplewithhighself-esteemarenothurtbycriticism;theydonotregardcriticismasapersonalattack.Instead,theyviewacriticismasasuggestionforimprovement.Incontrast,shypeople,havinglowself-esteem,arelikelytobepassiveandeasilyinfluencedbyothers.Theyneedreassurancethattheyaredoingtherightthing.Shypeopleareverysensitivetocriticism;theyfeelitconfirmstheirinferiority.Theyalsofinditdifficulttobepleasedbycomplimentsbecausetheybelievetheyareunworthyofpraise.Ashypersonmayrespondtoacomplimentwithastatementlikethisone:You'rejustsayingthattomakemefeelgood.Iknowit'snottrue.Itisclearthat,whileself-awarenessisahealthyquality,overdoingitisdetrimental,orharmful.Canshynessbecompletelyeliminated,oratleastreduced?Fortunately,peoplecanovercomeshynesswithdeterminedandpatienteffortinbuildingself-confidence.Sinceshynessgoeshandinhandwithlackofself-esteem,itisimportantforpeopletoaccepttheirweaknessesaswellastheirstrengths.Forexample,mostpeoplewouldliketobeAstudentsineverysubject.Itisnotfairforthemtolabelthemselvesasinferiorbecausetheyhavedifficultyinsomeareas.People'sexpectationsofthemselvesmustberealistic.Dwellingontheimpossibleleadstoasenseofinadequacy,andevenfeelingsofenvy,orjealousy.Weareself-destructivewhenweenvyastudentwhogetsbettergrades.Ifyouareshy,herearesomespecifichelpfulstepstowardbuildingself-confidenceandovercomingshyness:1.Recognizeyourpersonalstrengthsandweaknesses.Everyonehasboth.Asself-acceptancegrows,shynessnaturallydiminishes.2.Setreasonablegoals.Forexample,youmaybetimidaboutbeingwithagroupofstrangersataparty.Don'tfeelthatyoumustconversewitheveryone.Concentrateontalkingtoonlyoneortwopeople.Youwillfeelmorecomfortable.3.Guiltandshamearedestructivefeelings.Don'twastetimeandenergyonthem.Supposeyouhavehurtsomeone'sfeelings.Feelingashamedaccomplishesnothing.Instead,acceptthefactthatyouhavemadeamistake,andmakeupyourmindtobemoresensitiveinthefuture.4.Therearenumerousapproachestoallissues.Fewopinionsarecompletelyrightorwrong.Don'tbeafraidtospeakupandgiveyourpointofview.5.Donotmakenegativecommentsaboutyourself.Thisisaformofself-rejection.Avoiddescribingyourselfasstupid,ugly,afailure.Accentthepositive.6.Acceptcriticismthoughtfully.Donotinterpretitasapersonalattack.If,forexample,afriendcomplainsaboutyourcooking,acceptitasacommentonyourcooking,notyourself.Beassuredthatyouarestillgoodfriends,butperhapsyourcookingcouldimprove.7.Rememberthateveryoneexperiencessomefailuresanddisappointments.Profitfromthemaslearningexperiences.Veryoftenadisappointmentbecomesaturningpointforawonderfulexperiencetocomealong.Forinstance,youmayberejectedbythecollegeofyourchoice.However,atthecollegeyouactuallyattend,youmayfindaqualityofeducationbeyondwhatyouhadexpected.8.Donotassociatewithpeoplewhomakeyoufeelinadequate.Trytochangetheirattitudeoryours,orremoveyourselffromthatrelationship.Peoplewhohurtyoudonothaveyourbestinterestsatheart.9.Setasidetimetorelax,enjoyhobbies,andre-evaluateyourgoalsregularly.Timespentthiswayhelpsyoulearnmoreaboutyourself.10.Practicebeinginsocialsituations.Don'tisolateyourselffrompeople.Trymakingoneacquaintanceatatime;eventuallyyouwillcirculateinlargegroupswithskillandself-assurance.Eachoneofusisaunique,valuableindividual.Weareinterestinginourownpersonalways.Thebetterweunderstandourselves,theeasieritbecomestoliveuptoourfullpotential.Let'snotallowshynesstoblockourchancesforarichandfulfillinglife.TwoWaysofLookingatLifeYourattitudestronglyreflectsyouroutlookonlife.Takeacloserlookatthatconnection.Areyouapessimist—oranoptimist?Canyouseehowyourwayoflookingactuallydoescoloryourattitude?Andremember:changeyouroutlookandyouchangeyourattitude.Thefatherislookingdownintothecribathissleepingnewborndaughter,justhomefromthehospital.Hisheartisoverflowingwithaweandgratitudeforthebeautyofher,theperfection.Thebabyopenshereyesandstaresstraightup.Thefathercallshername,expectingthatshewillturnherheadandlookathim.Hereyesdon'tmove.4Hepicksupafurrylittletoyattachedtotherailofthecribandshakesit,ringingthebellitcontains.Thebaby'seyesdon'tmove.Hishearthasbeguntobeatrapi
本文标题:新编大学英语3课文原文
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