读后续写2

读后续写读后续写（25分）考试说明评分原则：（1）与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度；（2）内容的丰富性和对所给关键词语的应用情况；（3）应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性；（4）故事发展的合理性和上下文的连贯性提供一段350词以内的语言材料，要求考生依据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词进行续写，将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文（150词左右）。写作指导三个原则原文一致原则正能量原则曲折性原则内容要前后衔接，上下连贯,语言表达风格一致。凡是故事都应有跌宕起伏，其中人物会遇到困难或问题，但最终能解决。故事内容一定要正能量，弘扬社会主义核心价值观。如迷路了但最终一定回到了家；失败了或遇到困难了，但最终一定成功了；吵架了但最后一定是言归于好，和睦相处；犯错了，最后一定会改过自新，重新做人；四个步骤1.读懂大意，理清脉络读所给的不完整故事，弄清大意和主题，理清故事的主要人物和事件。2.细读首句，构思框架仔细阅读所给两段的首句，结合正能量结尾，思考大致框架。3.增加细节，开始写作依据情节发和常识，在确定的框架内，可按“所见/遇所想，所为所感”等构思具体细节。4.修改润色，整洁誊写思考再三，把修正润色后的续写整洁地写入答卷。读后续写阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为150左右。Velanwasacarpenter.Hewaslivinginavillage.Hismotherdiedalongtimeago.Hisagedfather,Kuppan,livedwithhim.Kuppanwasveryweak.Hecouldnotevenwalkwell.HewasweakbecauseVelandidnotgivehimenoughfood.Hehadgivenhisfatherasmallearthenplate.Soevenasmallquantityofboiledriceintheplateappearedtobemuch.Velanwasabadman.Hewasalsoadrunkard(酒鬼).Afterdrinkingtoomuch,hewascrueltohisfather.Velanhadason.HisnameisMuthu.Muthuwasjusttenyearsold.Hewasaverygoodboy.Helovedandrespectedhisgrandfather,whichhethoughtwashisduty.Hedidnotlikehisfather’sattitudetowardshisgrandfather,becausehisfatherwastreatinghisgrandfathercruelly.OnedayKuppanwaseatinghisfoodoutoftheearthenplatethathissonhadgiventohim.Suddenlytheearthenplatefelldownandbrokeintopieces.Thefoodalsofellontothefloor.Velanwasworkingattheotherendoftheroom.Whenhesawthebrokenplate,hewasveryangrywithhisfatherandusedveryharshwordstoabuseandscoldhisfather.Theoldmanfeltbadaboutwhathappened.Hewassorryforhismistake.Inaddition,hefeltdeeplywoundedbyVelan'swords.Velan’sson,Muthu,sawthis.Hedidnotlikehisfather.Hisfatherwasill-treatinghisgrandfather.Hewasafraidtospeakagainsthisfather.Hewassadabouthisgrandfather.Buthewasnotpowerful,sohecouldn’tbeinsupportofhisgrandfather.ThenextdayMuthutooksomeofhisfather’scarpentrytoolsandapieceofwood.Hedecidedtousethetoolstomakeawoodenplate.Hisfathersawhimworking.Paragraph1：HeaskedMuthuwhathewasmaking.Paragraph2：Thecarpenterwasshockedtohearthis.Part1读懂大意，理清脉络主要是根据记叙文的六要素弄清文章大意，特别要弄清故事的人物，时态(通常是一般过去时)，事件(故事的起因和经过)，语言特色(以便在续写时语言特色前后一致，保持不变)，等等。人物时态和事件语言特色不要变CharactersTenseEventsVelan,Kuppan,asmallearthenplate,Muthu,awoodenplateSimplepasttense•KuppanwasweakbecauseVelandidnotgivehimenoughfood.•Velanwasalsoadrunkard.Afterdrinkingtoomuch,hewascrueltohisfather.•Velan’sson,Muthu,Hedidnotlikehisfather’sattitudetowardshisgrandfather.•OnedayKuppanwaseatinghisfood,suddenlytheearthenplatefelldownandbrokeintopieces.•Velanwasveryangrywithhisfatherandusedveryharshwordstoabuseandscoldhisfather.•Muthudecidedtousehisfather’scarpentrytoolstomakeawoodenplate.语言特色1.Afterdrinkingtoomuch,hewascrueltohisfather.2.Helovedandrespectedhisgrandfather,whichhethoughtwashisduty.3.OnedayKuppanwaseatinghisfoodoutoftheearthenplatethathissonhadgiventohim.4.Whenhesawthebrokenplate,hewasveryangrywithhisfatherandusedveryharshwordstoabuseandscoldhisfather.5.Inaddition,hefeltdeeplywoundedbyVelan'swords.6.Buthewasnotpowerful,sohecouldn’tbeinsupportofhisgrandfather.由续写的第一段首句与第二段首句确定第一段的框架。两段首句定一框第二段的框架，由第二段首句与正能量结尾来确定。二框二首正能量细读首句，构思框架Part2Paragraph1：HeaskedMuthuwhathewasmaking.Paragraph2：Thecarpenterwasshockedtohearthis.两段首句定一框即由续写的第一段首句与第二段首句确定第一段的框架。由第一段首句可知，Velan应该是看到Muthu拿着他的工具和木头时感到奇怪，所以就询问他在做什么。而从第二句首句“木工听到这些话感到很震惊”来推测，Muthu在这里肯定是说了一些让Velan意想不到的话。例如是告诉Velan自己正准备做个木盘子，留着给他养老用。免得Velan老了以后用陶盘子吃饭会不小心打碎，避免自己会像他骂爷爷一样对待他。Paragraph2：Thecarpenterwasshockedtohearthis.二框二首正能量第二段的框架，由第二段首句与正能量结尾来确定。1.由第二段首句“shocked”可知，Velan绝对没想到会从儿子口中听到这些话的，接着应对他的后续反应作出描述；2.由正能量结尾可知，Velan不会因为这些话而责备儿子。因此，第二段框架可这样安排：Velan听完儿子的话后开始反省自己，简单回忆过去父亲是如何贴心照顾自己，而自己又是怎样回报他。另外，这里可结合材料来写，他认识到错误后就不再喝酒了。最后，可以一句Velan从儿子身上学到的道理来结尾（最好根据材料中的信息来调整）。增加细节，开始写作在已定框架范围内，依据情节发展和生活常识，推断故事中人物所见、所闻、所思、所说、所做等给每段增加5至8个具体细节Part3Paragraph1：HeaskedMuthuwhathewasmaking.构思即根据构思的大致框架，推断故事中人物所见、所思、所说、所做等每段增加五至八个具体细节所说答父所问，欲制木盘受父启发，制盘予父木盘养老，耐用经摔免父学爷，挨辱挨骂所做认识错误，重新做人戒酒革面，悟儿之理所思抚心自问，父爱如山己不爱之，甚辱骂之注意：1.写作时注意每段的主角，第一段以儿子Muthu为主角，第二段是父亲Velan。2.注意细节描写，如描述人物的动作、神态和心情。3.贯彻一致性原则。除内容上要语义衔接，上下连贯外，语言风格也要一致，如使用分词短语和从句。4.注意使用关联词语。Paragraph2：Thecarpenterwasshockedtohearthis.修改润色，整洁誊写审读初稿，注意语义是否衔接，前后是否连贯，事件是否符合逻辑，语言特色是否与前文一致。在修改润色之后，整齐工整地誊写在答卷上。Part3参考范文Paragraph1：HeaskedMuthuwhathewasmaking.Muthurepliedthathewasmakingawoodenplate.Hethenadded,“Iammakingitforyou,Dad.Whenyougrowold,likemygrandfather,youwillneedaplateforfood.Asyouknow,aplatemadefromearthmaybreakveryeasily.ThenImayscoldyouseverely.Thus,Iwanttogiveyouawoodenplate.Itwon’tbreaksoeasily.”Paragraph2：Thecarpenterwasshockedtohearthis.Itwasonlynowthatherealizedhismistakes.Hisfatherwaskindtohim.Hehadlookedafterhimverywell.Now,hewasold.ButVelanwastreatinghimcruelly.Velanwasnowverysadabouthisownbehavior.Havingrealizedhismistakes,hebecameadifferentman.Fromthatdayon,Velantreatedhisfatherwithgreatrespect.Hegaveupdrinking,too.Velanlearntalessonfromhisownson：weshouldrespectourparentsatalltimes,whichisourduty.3.上下连贯：两段续文都注重使用then,asyouknow或now等连词，这在所给材料中也有体现的；范文评析1.语义衔接：Paragraph1中replied与续写的首句“asked”衔接；2.语言风格：定语从句的使用与材料风格一致。如Paragraph1的when从句和Paragraph2中which从句在所给材料中的三、四