莫言在瑞典学院演讲：讲故事者-中英文对照

2012年诺贝尔文学奖获得者演讲Storytellers（中、英文版全文）TranslatedbyHowardGoldblattDistinguishedmembersoftheSwedishAcademy,LadiesandGentlemen:ThroughthemediumsoftelevisionandtheInternet,Iimaginethateveryoneherehasatleastanoddingacquaintancewithfar-offNortheastGaomiTownship.Youmayhaveseenmyninety-year-oldfather,aswellasmybrothers,mysister,mywifeandmydaughter,evenmygranddaughter,nowayearandfourmonthsold.Butthepersonwhoismostonmymindatthismoment,mymother,issomeoneyouwillneversee.Manypeoplehavesharedinthehonorofwinningthisprize,everyonebuther.尊敬的瑞典学院各位院士，女士们、先生们：通过电视或者网络，我想在座的各位，对遥远的高密东北乡，已经有了或多或少的了解。你们也许看到了我的九十岁的老父亲，看到了我的哥哥姐姐我的妻子女儿和我的一岁零四个月的外孙女。但有一个我此刻最想念的人，我的母亲，你们永远无法看到了。我获奖后，很多人分享了我的光荣，但我的母亲却无法分享了。Mymotherwasbornin1922anddiedin1994.Weburiedherinapeachorchardeastofthevillage.Lastyearwewereforcedtomovehergravefartherawayfromthevillageinordertomakeroomforaproposedrailline.Whenwedugupthegrave,wesawthatthecoffinhadrottedawayandthatherbodyhadmergedwiththedampeartharoundit.Sowedugupsomeofthatsoil,asymbolicact,andtookittothenewgravesite.ThatwaswhenIgraspedtheknowledgethatmymotherhadbecomepartoftheearth,andthatwhenIspoketomotherearth,Iwasreallyspeakingtomymother.我母亲生于1922年，卒于1994年。她的骨灰，埋葬在村庄东边的桃园里。去年，一条铁路要从那儿穿过，我们不得不将她的坟墓迁移到距离村子更远的地方。掘开坟墓后，我们看到，棺木已经腐朽，母亲的骨殖，已经与泥土混为一体。我们只好象征性地挖起一些泥土，移到新的墓穴里。也就是从那一时刻起，我感到，我的母亲是大地的一部分，我站在大地上的诉说，就是对母亲的诉说。Iwasmymother’syoungestchild.Myearliestmemorywasoftakingouronlyvacuumbottletothepubliccanteenfordrinkingwater.Weakenedbyhunger,Idroppedthebottleandbrokeit.Scaredwitless,Ihidallthatdayinahaystack.Towardevening,Iheardmymothercallingmychildhoodname,soIcrawledoutofmyhidingplace,preparedtoreceiveabeatingorascolding.ButMotherdidn’thitme,didn’tevenscoldme.Shejustrubbedmyheadandheavedasigh.我是我母亲最小的孩子。我记忆中最早的一件事，是提着家里唯一的一把热水瓶去公共食堂打开水。因为饥饿无力，失手将热水瓶打碎，我吓得要命，钻进草垛，一天没敢出来。傍晚的时候，我听到母亲呼唤我的乳名。我从草垛里钻出来，以为会受到打骂，但母亲没有打我也没有骂我，只是抚摸着我的头，口中发出长长的叹息。Mymostpainfulmemoryinvolvedgoingoutinthecollective’sfieldwithMothertogleanearsofwheat.Thegleanersscatteredwhentheyspottedthewatchman.ButMother,whohadboundfeet,couldnotrun;shewascaughtandslappedsohardbythewatchman,ahulkofaman,thatshefelltotheground.Thewatchmanconfiscatedthewheatwe’dgleanedandwalkedoffwhistling.Asshesatontheground,herlipbleeding,MotherworealookofhopelessnessI’llneverforget.Yearslater,whenIencounteredthewatchman,nowagray-hairedoldman,inthemarketplace,Motherhadtostopmefromgoinguptoavengeher.“Son,”shesaidevenly,“themanwhohitmeandthismanarenotthesameperson.”我记忆中最痛苦的一件事，就是跟随着母亲去集体的地里捡麦穗，看守麦田的人来了，捡麦穗的人纷纷逃跑，我母亲是小脚，跑不快，被捉住，那个身材高大的看守人搧了她一个耳光。她摇晃着身体跌倒在地。看守人没收了我们捡到的麦穗，吹着口哨扬长而去。我母亲嘴角流血，坐在地上，脸上那种绝望的神情让我终生难忘。多年之后，当那个看守麦田的人成为一个白发苍苍的老人，在集市上与我相逢，我冲上去想找他报仇，母亲拉住了我，平静地对我说：“儿子，那个打我的人，与这个老人，并不是一个人。”MyclearestmemoryisofaMoonFestivalday,atnoontime,oneofthoserareoccasionswhenweatejiaoziathome,onebowlapiece.Anagingbeggarcametoourdoorwhilewewereatthetable,andwhenItriedtosendhimawaywithhalfabowlfulofdriedsweetpotatoes,hereactedangrily:“I’manoldman,”hesaid.“Youpeopleareeatingjiaozi,butwanttofeedmesweetpotatoes.Howheartlesscanyoube?”Ireactedjustasangrily:“We’reluckyifweeatjiaoziacoupleoftimesayear,onesmallbowlfulapiece,barelyenoughtogetataste!Youshouldbethankfulwe’regivingyousweetpotatoes,andifyoudon’twantthem,youcangetthehelloutofhere!”After(dressingmedown)reprimandingme,Motherdumpedherhalfbowlfulofjiaoziintotheoldman’sbowl.我记得最深刻的一件事是一个中秋节的中午，我们家难得地包了一顿饺子，每人只有一碗。正当我们吃饺子时，一个乞讨的老人，来到了我们家门口。我端起半碗红薯干打发他，他却愤愤不平地说：“我是一个老人，你们吃饺子，却让我吃红薯干，你们的心是怎么长的？”我气急败坏地说：“我们一年也吃不了几次饺子，一人一小碗，连半饱都吃不了！给你红薯干就不错了，你要就要，不要就滚！”母亲训斥了我，然后端起她那半碗饺子，倒进老人碗里。MymostremorsefulmemoryinvolveshelpingMothersellcabbagesatmarket,andmeovercharginganoldvillageronejiao–intentionallyornot,Ican’trecall–beforeheadingofftoschool.WhenIcamehomethatafternoon,IsawthatMotherwascrying,somethingsherarelydid.Insteadofscoldingme,shemerelysaidsoftly,“Son,youembarrassedyourmothertoday.”我最后悔的一件事，就是跟着母亲去卖白菜，有意无意地多算了一位买白菜的老人一毛钱。算完钱我就去了学校。当我放学回家时，看到很少流泪的母亲泪流满面。母亲并没有骂我，只是轻轻地说：“儿子，你让娘丢了脸。”MothercontractedaseriouslungdiseasewhenIwasstillinmyteens.Hunger,disease,andtoomuchworkmadethingsextremelyhardonourfamily.Theroadaheadlookedespeciallybleak,andIhadabadfeelingaboutthefuture,worriedthatMothermighttakeherownlife.Everyday,thefirstthingIdidwhenIwalkedinthedoorafteradayofhardlaborwascalloutforMother.Hearinghervoicewaslikegivingmyheartanewleaseonlife.Butnothearingherthrewmeintoapanic.I’dgolookingforherinthesidebuildingandinthemill.Oneday,aftersearchingeverywhereandnotfindingher,Isatdownintheyardandcriedlikeababy.Thatishowshefoundmewhenshewalkedintotheyardcarryingabundleoffirewoodonherback.Shewasveryunhappywithme,butIcouldnottellherwhatIwasafraidof.Sheknewanyway.“Son,”shesaid,“don’tworry,theremaybenojoyinmylife,butIwon’tleaveyoutilltheGodoftheUnderworldcallsme.”我十几岁时，母亲患了严重的肺病，饥饿，病痛，劳累，使我们这个家庭陷入困境，看不到光明和希望。我产生了一种强烈的不祥之感，以为母亲随时都会自寻短见。每当我劳动归来，一进大门，就高喊母亲，听到她的回应，心中才感到一块石头落了地，如果一时听不到她的回应，我就心惊胆颤，跑到厢房和磨坊里寻找。有一次，找遍了所有的房间也没有见到母亲的身影。我便坐在院子里大哭。这时，母亲背着一捆柴草从外边走进来。她对我的哭很不满，但我又不能对她说出我的担忧。母亲看透我的心思，她说：“孩子，你放心，尽管我活着没有一点乐趣，但只要阎王爷不叫我，我是不会去的。”Iwasbornugly.Villagersoftenlaughedinmyface,andschoolbu