哈佛大学幸福课课件1504-08-ppt

Outline•WhatisPerfectionism?•Characteristics•Consequences•SuccessandHappiness•SourcesofPerfectionism•OvercomingPerfectionismLearntofailorfailtolearnCrisis(WeiJi)DangerandOpportunity“Thegreatestmistakeamancanmakeistobeafraidofmakingone.”ElbertHubbardThePathofFailure•Age22:Lostjob•Age23:Defeatedforstatelegislature•Age24:Failedinbusiness•Age27:Nervousbreakdown•Age34:Ranforcongressanddefeated•Age39:Defeatedagain•Age46:Ranforsenateanddefeated•Age47:Defeatedfornominationforvicepresident•Age50:Defeatedagainforsenate•Age51:16thUSPresident“Freedomisnotworthhavingifitdoesnotconnotefreedomtoerr.”MohandasGandhi“Theimportantworkofmovingtheworldforwarddoesnotwaittobedonebyperfectmen.”GeorgeEliotThomasWatsonSr.IBMAmyEdmondson(1999)“PsychologicalSafety”“Ifyouwanttoincreaseyoursuccessrate,doubleyourfailurerate.”ThomasWatsonSr.•“OriginsofGenius”(Simonton,1999)Perfectionismisanincapacitatingfearoffailurethatpermeatesourlives,especiallythoseareasthatwecareaboutmost.Itisanapproach,acognitiveandemotionalschema,thatweholdtowardthejourneyofourlives,towardtheprocessofgettingfrompointAtopointB.PerfectionVs.ExcellenceCharacteristicsDefensiveOpentoSuggestionsHalfEmptyHalfFullOverGeneralizeRealisticNoSelf-AcceptanceUnconditionalAcceptanceStaticDynamicPerfectionExcellenceFearoffailureFailureasfeedbackFocusonDestinationJourneyandDestinationPerfectionVs.ExcellenceConsequencesTemporaryReliefLastingSatisfactionInevitableFailurePossibilityofSuccessWastestimeAppropriateTimeAllocationPronetodisordersHealthyApproachHurtsSelf-EsteemContinuousImprovementHarmsRelationshipsAllowsforGrowthAnxiety/StressCreativeTensionPerfectionExcellencePerformance?LessPainMoreGainLessPainMoreGain??*@#!!#??•Sustainableapproachtogrowth•Procrastination•Higherlevelsofself-confidence•Learntofailorfailtolearn•‘TheLuckFactor’(Wiseman,2003)•Creativity(Simonton,1999)•80/20Rule(Pareto’sPrinciple)•Increaseinflowexperiences(Csikszentmihalyi,1991)SourceofPerfectionism•ConditioningDestination=Reward=AcceptanceJourney=Unrewarded=MeansOnly•Socialenvironment•Permissiontobehuman?OvercomingPerfectionism•AwarenessOvercomingPerfectionism•Awareness•ActiveAcceptance•Behaviorchangesattitude•Meditationandvisualization•Settingaliberatinggoalorvision•ThePlatinumRule•Helpingothers?Naturetobecommandedmustbeobeyed.FrancisBacon