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《爱情公寓之变态面试篇》•陆--陆展博(郭茂男)•吕--吕子乔(王婧霏)•L--Lisa榕(刘小华)•曾--曾小贤(王婧霏)•胡--胡一菲(杨梅)•宛--宛瑜(王永勤)•Hu:Areyoudoingaconstellationtestagain?胡:又在做星座测试?•Wan:Thisisinaresume.宛:我这是在投简历。•Hu:Clearlyyouaredoingatest.胡:明明就是在做题嘛。•Wan:Thisiscalledcharactertest,Ihaveputmyresumetolotsofcompanies.Everyonewilldoatestbeforetheinterview.婉:这个叫个性测试,我把简历有了很多家公司。面试之前都要先做一套测试题•Lu:Thisisverypopularinaforeigncompany,whichcantesttheperson'sheartwiththatpositionwhetheraccordwithcharacter.陆:这在外企很流行的,说是能检验人的内心性格跟那个岗位是否符合。•Hu:Foreignersreallytrouble,isthereagreatrelationshipbetweenpersonalityandpost?胡:外国人真麻烦,性格和岗位有很大关系吗?•Wan:Butsomequestionsaresostrange.宛:可是有些问题好奇怪哦。•Lu:Normal,theseproblemscomefromthepsychologicalexperts.Itlooksstrangeatfirst,butitcantrulyreflectyouroutlookonlife,values.Itislearned.陆:正常,这些问题都是心理专家出的。咋一看很奇怪,但是可以真实地反映出你的人生观,价值观,很有学问的•Wan:Comeheretoseethisproblem,saymosquitoesandthetigerincommon.宛:你看这道题,说出蚊子和老虎的共同点。•Lu:err...Thisisatestofyourthinkingability,toseeyourthinkingabilityisconcreteorabstract.陆:额。。。这是考验你的思维能力的,看你的思维能力是具象的还是抽象的•Wan:Andwhataboutthisproblem?IfyourdadandjayZhouplayup,whichonedoyouwanttohelp?Ahelpyoupapa.BhelpjayZhou.Clookatthemplay.Dcalltelevision宛:那这道题呢?如果你爸爸和周杰伦打起来了,你帮谁?A帮你爸爸B帮周杰伦C看着他们打D打电话给电视台•Lu:Well...ThisshowsthattheircompanyhumanresourcesdepartmentoftheeldestbrotherisjayZhou'sfans,anddadalsobeplayed.陆:嗯。。。这就说明,他们公司人力资源部的老大诗周杰伦的粉丝,而且爸爸还被人打了。•Wan:Haveyoumetsoabnormaltopicwhenyouarelookingforawork?宛:你找工作的时候,有没有遇到过这么变态的题目?•Lu:yes!Thereisaquestionthatyouhavetwopants,adirtydidn'twash,awashnotdry,whichonedoyouchoose?陆:有啊!有一道题是这样的,你有两条内裤,一条脏了没洗,一条洗了没干,你选择穿哪条?•Hu:Thisisthetestyourvaluesofthetopic!胡:这就是检验你价值观的题目啊!•Wan:Goodsickah,I’lldespiseyou,nomatteryouchooseanyone.宛:好恶心啊,你穿那条我都鄙视你。•Lu:hum...Ha...Ididn‘tchoose.陆:哼。。。哈。。。我两个都没选。•All:Idespiseyou.众:我鄙视你。•LvZiqiaoappearances吕子乔出场•Lv:Haha...Lookatme.Whatdoyouthinkofmytoday'smodeling?吕:哈哈。。。看我今天的造型怎么样?•All:Handsome!众:很帅啊!•Hu:Quitelikepersonalkindof.胡:挺像个人样的。•Lv:Thiscanbeaturningpointinmylife.吕:这有可能成为我人生中的转折点。•Lu:LvZiqiao,doyoualsowanttogototheinterview?陆:吕子乔,你也要去参加面试?•Lu:You’reright......Iknewthatatelevisionwilltakeidoldrama.Andthey’rerecruitingactor,andthisidoldrama’sproducerisawoman.吕:那是。。我知道了某电视台要拍偶像剧,正在招募演员。我又从小道消息打听到,这个偶像剧的制片人是个女的哟。•Hu:Waitaminute,yourlogicisabitjump,you’regoingtobetheactorwhileyoujusthearafewwordsfromagossip?胡:慢着慢着,你这逻辑有点跳跃,你从小道消息打听到这么几句就想改行当演员?•Lv:Don'tlookdownonothers,waitformysuccess.吕:别这么看不起人,你就等着我出名吧。•Wan:ah...Thismorning,ZengXiaoxiansaidthathewouldgotoTVstationtowaitforhischancetobethehost,isn'tit?婉:哎。。。今天早晨,曾老师不是说要去电视台等待自己做主持人的机会吗?•Now,pleaselookatZengXiaoxian’sinterview下面,请看曾小贤得面试•Zeng:Goodmanisme,I‘mZengXiaoxian.Lisaisoverthere.Calmdown,calmdown...曾:好男人就是我,我就是曾小贤。Lisa榕在那儿。镇定镇定。。。•Zeng:Oh?Lisa!曾:哦?Lisa!•想象中。(歌曲:想象之中)•L:It’syou,ZengXiaoxian?!L:是你,曾小贤?!•Zeng:Youknowme?曾:你认识我?•Zeng:really?Whatacoincidence!曾:是吗?太巧了!•L:I'mgladthatyoumetme,ourtelevisionismakinganewprograms,weneedahandsomeandnaturalhost.Canyouhelpme?L:我庆幸你碰到了我,我们台里出了一档新的节目,需要一个英俊潇洒气度不凡的主持人,你来帮我好吗?•Zeng:good!It’smypleasure.ButmaybeIdon’thaveenoughtime,pleaseletmegobacktoexhaustthesessions.曾:好啊!非常荣幸,不过我可能呢没有时间,我回去排一下档期。L:oh,no,justyou!Ourprogram’sratingdependsonyou,promiseme!~~~•L:奥,不,就你了!我节目的收视率就靠你了,答应我嘛~~~•现实之中reality(歌曲:残酷月光)•Zeng:well,Lisa.曾:额,Lisa。•L:What’sup?L:有事?•Zeng:Youmaynotknowme.Pleaseletmeintroducemyself,mynameisZengXiaoxian.曾:你可能不认识我.我自我介绍一下,我叫曾小贤。•L:ZengXiaoxian,you’rethehost,aren’tyou?L:曾小贤,你就是那个主持人吧?•(Yesyesyes,sheknewme!Ihaveahope,Ihaveahope!)(是是是,她认识我!我有希望了,我有希望了!)•Weusedtobecolleagues!Iusedtoworkinaradiostation,makingaprogramcalledthecrystalloveprogram我们以前还是同事呢!我以前在电台做一档叫水晶之恋的节目•Zeng:Ohh...Thatwasmadebyyou!Ilikelisteningtoeachofthem,youarereallygreat!曾:奥。。。原来是你做的!我可喜欢听了,每期都听,你主持的真是太棒了•L:Thankyou,Ithinkyoushouldgotothehospital,theprogramhostisanoldman,I’mjustaproducer(ha~!)L:谢谢,我觉得你应该去医院看一下,那档节目的主持人是个老头子,我只是制片人(哈~!)•Zeng:MaybeImadeamistake,sincewehaveworkedtogethermeanswestillverydecreebydestinies,amIright?曾:可能是我搞错了,既然我们共事过说明我们还是很有缘分的对不对?•L:Farmorethanthefate!Itisorigin,atthattime,Myprogramratingswasbad,neartheendoftheyearoverallrating,IthinkI'mmustbethebottom,eventheresignationarewrittenwellbutalsogoodtohaveyou,yousavedme.L:何止缘分呀!简直是渊源,那时候,我节目收视率一直不好,快到年底总评的时候,我觉得我肯定垫底了,连辞职报告都写好了不过还好有你,你救了我。•Zeng:Idon'tremember?WillIgetyouforleadership?曾:我不记得啊?我去帮你求领导的吗?•L:WhenIseeprogramsoverallratingtable,Ifindyourprogramratingspadinmynext,youarethelastone.L:我看到节目总评表的时候,发现你的节目收视率垫在我的下面,你才是最后一名。•Zeng:ThatiswhatIshoulddo.ThatiswhatIshoulddo.....曾:应该的,应该的。THANKYOU
本文标题:爱情公寓之变态面试
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